Yesterday was one of those "mommy days" that I am not so proud of. You know the kind you wish you could just start all over and do EVERYTHING differently! It was also somewhat emotional for me as I dropped off my oldest for his first ever 3 day 4-h camp experience. My 'baby' gone to camp for THREE days! He is quite capable and will have a blast..... it is just a little harder on this Mama than I thought it would be.
Put together the Mama emotions and the other stresses of the day and by night I was spent. Ever been there? I was actually exhausted and extremely upset with myself. All day I had been mad.... mad at the kids, mad at me, mad at circumstances. Surprise, surprise I didn't sleep well last night. Every time I woke up I felt the anger start to rise again... YUCK! So I just started praying. I prayed for forgiveness, for my son's camp trip and for a soft heart. I want a heart like a sponge not a rock. By last night my heart was so hard that it just felt like a rock.... I don't want to live that way. I want to be able to soak up life rather than let it all run off of me. I don't want anger and stress turn my heart into a rock so that I can't feel simple joy and feel the warmth of a gentle breeze....... I want to be sensitive to the feelings of others, open to opportunities to serve others rather than self.
Today has been MUCH better!!!! I got the day started off right... in the WORD! God does hear our prayers and His word is life! His word is the same regardless of my *feelings*. I can stand on HIS promises, I get my strength from him. I have so much to do, but am not letting it get me stressed... I am going to ENJOY today..... I can't re-live yesterday, I am not guaranteed tomorrow, my life is TODAY!!!! Smile, hugs, kind words and loving discipline. I read EXTRA stories to the little ones at nap time and spent time in my flower beds.... life is good!
Have a BLESSED day, BE a BLESSING!